September is wedding season. I have been to many weddings over the last few weeks and all of them have been beautiful and moving. There has been one constant to all the weddings that I have attended. Some of the ceremonies have been ultra serious and some have been more jovial in nature. Yet, the end to these rituals has been the same. We ended with a solemn song remembering the destruction of the Holy Temple and expressing our deep love for Jerusalem.
The Talmud teaches us that one time there was a wedding and the festivities were so joyous that one of the Rabbis was worried that we would forget the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. He broke an expensive glass as a reminder to all that as happy as we were regarding the building of a new home in Israel, the Almighty’s home stood desolate. As a result, the Jewish Nation took on the custom to break a glass at the end of every wedding ceremony.
Another custom has arisen over the past year and our family has personally celebrated this ritual at both of our weddings. Before the breaking of the glass, many have sung together the prayer for the welfare of the IDF. It is a beautiful, modern day custom that joins our love of the Almighty and Jerusalem to the incredible heroes who stand in defense of the Jewish people.
A few days ago, I attended the wedding of the daughter of a dear classmate of mine from yeshiva 35 years ago. Avi Ciment was my apartment mate and has since become an international lecturer on Torah values for young Jews. He and his wife Adina married off their daughter Tamar to Ayal Yakobe. As with many of the weddings that I attend, I didn’t fully know the backstory of the bride and groom.
At the ceremony, my good friend and uncle of the bride, Jason Ciment, told me that after the groom heard what happened on October 7th, he left school in New York and got on the first plane to rejoin his IDF unit to serve alongside his brothers in Israel. In fact they were worried that he wouldn’t make it back in time for the wedding as he had served so much over the past year. Suffice it to say that as we all stood for the prayer for the soldiers in Israel everyone was in awe of the “hero-groom.”
For Jews, the word hero has always meant something different than it has for the rest of the world. A Jewish hero is someone who supports his fellow citizens no matter the consequences. Making sure that all of us are looked after spiritually and physically. Here was a wedding where the bride’s father, a businessman, travels around to spiritually uplift young Jews while his son-in-law is defending the Jewish people. I don’t know of a more beautiful combination.
This is why the Jewish Nation will make it through what has turned out to be one of the most difficult years of our history. As I was in New York for this past week’s 9/11 commemoration, I was surprised by the lack of events and memorials. I remember all too well the horror of that day having grown up as a New Yorker in the shadows of those majestic buildings. We must always remember the heroic sacrifices of the victims and the senseless destruction that was committed on that day.
A Nation must always remember its past as it marches forward into the future. That is the secret of the longevity of the Jewish people. Two thousand years after the destruction of our temple we still feel its loss in our heart at the moment of our greatest joy. As we soon mark one year since the horrific October 7th attacks, we must come closer to each other than ever before. We must remember our fallen brothers and sisters. We must remember the courage and ongoing sacrifice of the IDF and security forces. We must remember the suffering of the families whose relatives are still held captive in Gaza. We must remember the families who remain displaced after 11 months. We must remember that the Jews are at our strongest when we are unified. May the Almighty return the hostages and protect all those that protect us.
